Here’s Sady Doyle on why being a feminist blogger is sickening and depressing as hell. Yup.
5 Responses to “What she said”
I’d say that blogging while female in general is sickening and depressing as hell. It doesn’t have to have anything to do with feminism or politics, threats and slurs are the go-to move to deal with any woman anywhere who does anything anywhere doesn’t like.
I know that people like to think that the online world is much uglier than the real world, but Twitter is a cesspool, and a large percentage of Twitter users are tweeting with their RL friends, family members, co-workers, often using their names and pictures. The social acceptability feels quite high.
Violet Socks says:
Yes. But for me, blogging was a Germaine Greer-type realization. I had no idea how much men hated women until I started writing online.
In real life I had encountered the following: street harassment, sexual harassment, attempted sexual assault, mansplaining, condescension, and, in my younger days, outright sexual discrimination (as in being refused a credit card in my name and not my husband’s, being denied a job because I was female and the guy had no compunction about telling me so, etc.).
If you’re a guy reading this, you might think that’s bad enough. If you’re a woman you know this is just par for the course, and you’re probably thinking “damn, Violet got off easy.” And I did, really, compared to a lot of women.
But until I got online, I’d never been subjected to the kind of raw violent hatred that Sady Doyle talks about. Online the misogyny is just so fucking pure. These people don’t really know me, they’re not interacting with me as a human being, they don’t know what I look like or anything else. It’s just like they see a female expressing an opinion and they go into KILL KILL KILL mode. It’s frightening to realize how many men respond to the mere fact of femaleness with rape threats, death threats, towering rage, and so on.
And of course someone will say, “but everything online is like that,” but of course it’s not. Check the stats again. It is overwhelmingly women who receive this kind of crap, and they receive it from men.
Men’s overtly expressed misogyny has been around me my whole life because pornography has been around me my whole life.
Radical feminists have been trying for 40 years to help other women open their eyes to men joyously reveling in sex-based hatred of us, but our society is geared towards ignoring the historic, collective patterns of that hatred until it comes homepage to roost.
There is one important difference. No feminist bloggers has been assaulted by the men spitting verbal vituperative, but pornstituted women whose pictures of their sexualized bodies are publicly labelled with the kind of verbal vitriol that’s new to feminist bloggers are the most raped people on the planet.
When radfems point out the hate speech of pornography is itself a form of sexist abuse that also perpetuates more abuse against pornstituted women, we’re called hysterical haters of humanity for maintaining that words have political power which create real effects in people’s lives.
Violet, I know you get what I’m saying because you’ve never split the abuse that happens to prostituted women from the abuse non-prostituted women encounter. My thoughts are spurred by those who still STILL make excuses for pimpographers, the ones who hypocritically support men calling a sex worker a “flea-bitten cunt who deserves to have her tongue ripped out of her suck-hole” so long as she pockets some paltry amount of cash for the ‘sex work transaction’.
tinfoil hattie says:
No feminist bloggers has been assaulted by the men spitting verbal vituperative,
How do you know? And, is it a contest: Which “type” of woman is treated the worst?
None have said they have been assaulted that I know. Have you read otherwise?
I don’t understand the “contest” question. As I understand the issue, it’s about the oppressive real-life consequences of violently sexist verbal abuse aimed at women, abuse I don’t believe is acceptable whether the target is a blogger or a prostitute and whether they are paid or not.