Oh yeah, patriarchy’s totally dead

Monday, March 26th, 2007 · 12 Comments »

Every time I read somebody saying that patriarchy doesn’t exist anymore, feminism’s won, etc., etc., I think, try being a feminist blogger for a while. Or if you already are a feminist blogger, wait a bit until the shit finds you. Or try doing online research on anything connected to feminism and find yourself shoulder-deep in a slime pit of woman-hating so toxic it makes you want to weep with fear and despair.

I’m reminded of that right now because a blogger named Kathy Sierra is under some pretty serious attack. I don’t know this blogger at all; I’m only aware of the situation because Lindsay Beyerstein (Majikthise) mentioned it.

Go see for yourself.

This is not some isolated thing. Women in the blogosphere catch this stuff all the time. The most popular feminist bloggers rack up hundreds of these vomitous threats. There are websites — popular websites — where men indulge in this frenzy of hatred every goddamn day. Incredibly enough, these same websites often have long, moist-palmed diatribes against feminism as a “hate” ideology.

I don’t know how to help Kathy, except to leave messages of support, but I’ll keep you posted if the collective femblog brain comes up with anything we can do.

God, sometimes I just feel so fucking tired.

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12 Responses to “Oh yeah, patriarchy’s totally dead”

  1. Infidel says:

    Most people don’t have a murder problem, but most do have anger issues. A counselor said that a vast majority of people who come to him for counsel have an inability to forgive. He cites anger to be at the root of their refusal to forgive. From anger grows bitterness, which turns to resentment, hatred, and apathy or a hard-hearted indifference. Most of us feel justified in our anger toward others.
    Say Raca and face the Sanhedrin, say FOOL and face the fires of hell. Be considerate and know that you too are probably pissing someone off. Do you need to be forgiven for pissing someone off? Are they wrong for being pissed off? Are they who they are because of what pisses them off? Does piss off define one? It certainly pisses me off that death threats are leveled against someone who takes them seriously. I’m pissed off that death threats are implicitly leveled against Violet for showing cartoon images of the prophet as a matter of radical Islam, but I accept that she won’t take that seriously enough to unpost them and apologize to the Muslims of the world, many of whom blog.

  2. Strata Chalup says:

    At least there’s now something to say back at cretins who say that all Muslims must be Evil because the moderate ones don’t keep the fanatics in check. Tell the guy who’s sayiing that, “hey, have you spoken out against any woman-hater bloggers or blogsites lately? No? Well how are we going to control it if even the decent men don’t get off their asses and DO SOMETHING about it?”


    Time for more women’s spaces, more women’s conferences (without the guys, please, and that includes the ‘nice’ ones too, sorry, go do something else for those 2 days and watch the sessions on the web later), etc.

    Hugs. Don’t give up.

  3. SimSabalim says:

    The comments on Kathy Sierra’s blog are closed (which I understand). The death threats are horrifying, and I hope she remains safe. I wanted to voice my worries and show my support. I wish this wasn’t part of our society; I am so sorry.

  4. Joey says:

    I am just as tired trying to counter anti-science and magical thinking all my life; let alone the many misrepresentations of Kathy’s story on thousands of blogs — one by one and by hand; but lately, just the good ones ;)

    There was never any intentional misogyny at MeanKids. Far more men and their lame activities or publications were criticized. Kathy juxtaposed a horrible posting on her own board with the criticism of her books and works as a combined “death threat”. She was aware of the site and frequented it since it started in February. My now stupid and infamous comment, not even directed at her but instead to a fictional character, happened 10 days earlier and I’m fairly sure (based on records) she saw it then.

    I’m not trying to intentionally insult Kathy here by pointing out these things, it is just frustrating watching the twists and turns and so many people use Kathy’s misrepresented story as a cause to start a cause.

    Honestly presented cases make much better foundations for any cause.

    But please, keep up the fight. Get untired. Get to work. This world is a disaster and only getting worse. I did my share ruining it; just not entirely the way it’s been described.

    If anything, I’m misanthropic now. Gender isn’t the only issue: honesty and social trust are vital too.



  5. Paul Ritchie says:

    There aren’t many things on the internet that anger me enough to do anything about it, but recently two things have made my blood boil to the point where I was prepared to take it off the net and into real life.

    Both concerned what I perceived to be a threat to kids. Say what you like about me – and they are, believe me – but threaten kids and you take the consequences.

    Kathy Sierra, on the other hand, has taken the word “threat” backwards by 400 years. Before she pulled the biggest DQ stunt in 20 years, how many of you had even heard of her?

    If I say nasty things about someone on my blog and word gets around, how does my sounding off translate into a threat to commit murder – no matter what sort of images I put up? The answer to that is: By means of a lie. There was no death threat. That was an invention of Kathy Sierra’s because she doesn’t like Chris Locke.

    I’ve been sounding off about Kathy Sierra all week and I haven’t had so much as one comment in support of her. A few anonymous hate comments towards me, almost all of them would be actionable but I’ve simply deleted them. Or should I have cancelled a contract or two and cited blog bullying as my reason.

    Ah well… if only Helen Darville had’ve been a male.

  6. Violet says:

    Okay, I don’t know who sent the flying monkeys, but piss off. Not interested in hosting the massive self-pity party from the little boys club.

    Joey, if that’s really you, the reasonable-person act is coming along well, but I’m afraid there’s already too much of you online in your normal incarnation to be persuasive.

    (In case anyone’s interested, here’s Joey’s original comment, which was explicitly about Kathy Sierra in a thread about Kathy and a recent blog post of hers; it certainly doesn’t seem to be about a fictional character, no matter what Joey says now. And Joey’s companion on that thread is the same Rev Ed who fantasized openly about raping Sierra. As for misogyny on meankids, the creator of the site himself, Frank Paynter, has acknowledged this week that the misogyny was so out-of-control that that’s why he had to take the site down. Just for a taste, here’s a post about another female blogger, with our pal Joey nodding enthusiastically along.)

    Joey and Paul and your friends, I wish you luck in working out your personal issues. In the meantime, there’s an interesting article in Salon today with a phrase you might pay particular attention to: “There is nothing like hysterical masculine self-pity posing as righteous indignation.”

  7. simply wondered says:

    errr who are these people and how come they are suddenly interested in your site, vi? either of them post here before?

  8. Violet says:

    No, neither of them have ever posted here before. Joey is claiming to be the same Joey whose noose comment with the posted image of Kathy next to a noose was part of what pushed her over the edge. And I guess Paul is his little friend.

  9. simply wondered says:

    nice to have them taking an interest, though.

  10. a louis wain cat says:

    This whole incident reminds me a lot of the AutoAdmit thing, in the way it illustrates the particular variety of vicious misogyny one finds among certain wealthy, well-educated, respected white-collar guys.

    I actually already knew of Chris Locke before this happened. A while back, researching some bit of esoteric environmentalist history or other, I came across one of his blogs, and it annoyed me so much I almost put him on my list in the Hate Fest post. It was, in fact, partially for misogyny. (And partially for using such sweeping guilt-by-faint-association techniques in his anti-pagan/New Age crusade that he was pretty much accusing Starhawk of being a crypto-Nazi, partially for having an annoying writing style, and partially for the sheer and apparently unintentional irony of someone who writes books aimed at marketers railing against the “bourgeois.”) Then this happened. Yeah, he might not have actually made the threats, but between helping to create an environment that encouraged them and then, when this whole thing blew up, taking the opportunity to call Sierra a “dipshit” again in his statement on it- well, suffice it to say, if I were making that list now, he’d definitely end up on it this time. Probably pretty high up, too, if I were ordering it that way.

  11. BAC says:

    Hi Violet, haven’t been here for awhile, but want to comment here. Clearly Joey and Paul have no clue what it is like to be female. Robin Morgan has written about this — how when a man is walking down the street, and hears footsteps behind him, rarely does he feel threatened. When a woman walks down the street, and hears footsteps coming up behind her, she has to be alert to who might be coming after her. Sadly, it’s a different world depending on whether you are male or female.

    Anyone who receives a death threat should take it seriously. Religious right fanatics and misogynist men have a track record of making good on their threats.

    And while I’m here, there is still time to take part in “Blog Against Theocracy.” There is a link to the site with information about it on my blog. Please join in!


  12. Violet says:

    BAC, I must have missed your comment when it came in last week. Thank you for the invitation! I missed the festivities this year but next year I look forward to Blog Against Theocracy day.