“Where’s Violet?”
she asked, referring to herself in the third person.
“I’m right here,” she mumbled to herself through a mouthful of vegetable lo mein as she pasted in the embedding code for a YouTube video.
“You know, you really need to write another post. Actually say something. People will start to think you’ve abandoned the blog.”
“I know, I know. But I’ve got to finish the plot outline for Part II and sort out how I’m going to do the ending of Part I. People can watch this neat kuchipudi dance in the meantime.”
“Jesus God, that is so fucking lame. A YouTube video? You’re not even going to write anything? Comment on all the stuff that’s happening in the world? You’re just going to keep your nose in that stupid book of yours?”
“Look, I’m right here at the computer all the time. I can read people’s comments, I can comment myself, I can beat the shit out of Paul whenever necessary. Everything’s fine.”
And with that she hit Publish.
s
31 Responses to ““Where’s Violet?””
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Paul Tergeist says:
I can beat the shit out of Paul whenever necessary.
-ViolentWhat’s in that lo mein? LSD? Don’t mess with me Missy or I’ll throw a poodle on your leg.
February 5th, 2007 at 9:25 pm EST -
Violet says:
What’s in that lo mein?
I don’t know, but I’m starting to wonder myself because I am developing one hellacious headache. It feels like there is a tiny demon homunculus with a jackhammer living behind my left eyeball. I don’t think I usually have a reaction to Chinese food, though, so it’s probably just a coincidence.
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ehj2 says:
dear violet,
is it third person day? my guess is that one should not be too quick to pick on the north american supplier of rare isotopes. remember niven’s laws?
[1] don’t throw shit at an armed man.
[2] don’t stand next to someone throwing shit at an armed man.
just saying. but enjoy your potables and comestibles. and the little flying monkeys.
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Paul Tergeist says:
It feels like there is a tiny demon homunculus with a jackhammer living behind my left eyeball.
-VioletA homosexual demon?!?!? How odd! Maybe it is skullf…or maybe not.
To Ehj2: Everything you write is beautiful, mellifluous, poetic. To bad you are a Frenchie. BTW, I have a MicroCurie of AM231 for sale if anyone wants it. Thirty nine cents American.
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Paul Tergeist says:
Brainwashed female astronaut arrested in love triangle (read murder plot). I blame the patriarchy!
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will says:
Paul:
I blame the lack of size small spacesuits. How could she compete for his affections when she had to gain weight to go to space!!??!?! Blame NASA.
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ehj2 says:
Dear Paul,
See, I think it’s soooo unfortunate you’re a beastly American … and that you would make a really delightful Frenchie. We have good hours and being libidinous and concupiscent is in the job description. And here, as opposed to there, being a religious wack is optional rather than obligatory.
If it hadn’t been for us serious folks distracting the Brits (you know, your obvious superiors), you wouldn’t even have your pathetic little country.
How’s that working out? Do you still dream of one day having freedom and democracy? Maybe you could start with an educated, literate, and numerate leader. Pretty please?
Regards,
your pal
/ehj2
Frenchie Poet -
Mandos says:
By the way, I’m liveblogging the Libby trial from DC.
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Paul Tergeist says:
“How’s that working out? Do you still dream of one day having freedom and democracy? Maybe you could start with an educated, literate, and numerate leader. Pretty please?”
-ehj2Dear Gaulstone. Do not diss our President who was personally appointed by Jesus. He has had many notable successes, including the repression of many overrated human rights and is working hard to repeal the Magna Carta just as he did the Constitution.
We don’t have wishy-washy politicians in this country. If they don’t like you, it’s a shotgun round to the face or a trip to Gitmo, which is where your president is likely to end up if he doesn’t stop trying to make an asshole out of ‘Murka.
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Paul Tergeist says:
How can I have typed ‘to’ when I obviously meant ‘too’? I blame the Clintons and the liberal judges they appointed. And the French.
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ehj2 says:
“… where your president is likely to end up if he doesn’t stop trying to make an asshole out of ‘Murka.”
Dear Paul,
I believe it has required no assistance from the French to “make an asshole out of ‘Murka.”
As for your boast regarding the likelihood of revenge, in light of your national experiment with intelligent design and widespread suppression of science and education, I don’t think you people could find France with a map,. While we in Europe have moved on from the primitive notion of a flat earth (is this intelligent geography?), your own prophets (like Tom Friedman), seem to just now be “discovering” it. Forgive me if I don’t pat you on your collective heads for this “achievement.”
You seem to be proud of a few big boats you have that are nuclear-powered, even though you can’t afford to run them without borrowing $3 billion a day from your Asian bankers. I could ask, “How long do you think they’ll continue to fund your shot-gunning of other people in the face?” But I’m more interested in knowing, “If your army is really paid by the Chinese, is it fighting in your interest, or theirs?” Just curious.
France, by way of comparison, is a nuclear-powered country with an actual 30-year energy plan. We’ll be sitting here enjoying aged cheeze and fine wine with our loved ones while you are shivering in the dark, eating twigs and burning dried leaves you’ve collected from your yard for heat.
How’d you manage to use up that whole continent in 200 years?
Well, gotta go. I see it’s time for my chocolate and a massage.
Your pal always,
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simply wondered says:
‘France, by way of comparison, is a nuclear-powered country with an actual 30-year energy plan.’ – if you call ‘chucking the glowing stuff into the sea once you get bored of it’ a plan. and it’s not as if you have ireland for it to wash up on…bloody frogs – almost as bad as the septics
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ehj2 says:
Dear Simply Wondered,
If we’re slipping back into reality now, which is not a bad idea, then:
[1] we probably agree that the world has a serious energy crisis ahead of it, and no country has demonstrated that it can use nuclear power safely or responsibly (or is even vaguely honest about the total costs of nuclear power). If you’ve ever read the cover page to my site, you’ll be aware that current known world reserves of uranium are inadequate for world energy requirements, and the time frames for infrastructure building into an electric economy (or a nuclear powered hydrogen economy) are too short to help us much if we are indeed at peak oil within this decade.
[2] The Asian countries likely benefit from sitting on the sidelines while funding the west’s self-immolation in an ever more chaotic Middle East. No struggle of civilizations is easier to win than the one in which your potential opponents all gut each other.
[3] Without cheap power, the water wars will soon begin. This is, of course, the fundamental strategic driver for Israel in Palestine. Not land; water.
[4] I’m an American with a lifetime of government service (retired) and I live near the sacred capital city of WDC (where once Titans of democratic thought walked and wrote and worked). I’m a mongrel, with English and German blood from my mother — and 1/4 Native Indian and 1/4 French from my father (think Louisiana, a part of America we still haven’t taken; hence, my personal knowledge that French blood aint weak). In spite of my passport, I’m a citizen of the world. I believe that what is good for the world is good for America, not the other way around.
[5] Historically, I am ashamed and appalled that it took the United States so long to come to the full assistance of Britain in WWII — and then, when belatedly doing what was right, effectively billed Britain by stripping her of most of her international assets (now used by our Navy). You have my complete regret and deepest apologies for that utter failure of integrity and spirit. [While the billing is galling, it's the unyielding American pretense of our specialness and goodness that feels like a dull knife scraped over raw bone.]
I live here and I don’t know what America is about. I’ve seen what she can do when two buildings are knocked down. I fear what she might do if given real cause for anguish (even if she is the true cause of her own anguish).
Regards
/ehj2
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gordo says:
/ehj2–
I feel so bad for the Brits. Imagine being stripped of your empire, for no reason other than the fact that you’re no longer powerful enough to effectively oppress the natives.
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ehj2 says:
Dear Gordo,
I feel indebted to England for … of all things … the Church of England.
The foundations of the Protestant Church, however grounded in the nonsense of patriarchal Kingly grandiosity (sorry, I’m no Twisty Faster), are the same foundations for the separation of church and state, without which you can’t have liberal democracy.
I can forgive England a great deal just for that.
The record on colonialism is still being written. Parking all your felons in America or Australia does seem a bit of a black mark. The French did the same (to island work colonies, including Panama to work on what would eventually be the canal). The Russians have historically sent people (sometimes whole villages) north.
And there is that ongoing and ongoing and ongoing thing with the Irish … with elements of terrorism, rendition, torture, and murder on both sides. Undeniably sordid. But has America done better with its own Irish, the Native American Indians and the Blacks? With respect to the Native Americans, I see genocide. The British goofed badly a few times, but not as purposive national policy.
We’ll have to see how gracefully America retreats from her own place of empire before we can write a complete record. I don’t know that we’ll do as well. England turned on the lights in many places, and fought many times to keep the lights on. I’m not sure America isn’t often in the business of turning other people’s lights out.
Maybe I’m just old and grumpy.
I do love America. But I’d surely love a better America.
/ehj2
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roamaround says:
“…the separation of church and state…”!!??
Well, ehj2, to copy Gandhi’s answer to what he thought about Western civilization: “That would be a very good idea!”
Remember “Under God” was added to the Pledge of Allegiance (fascist enough to begin with) under McCarthyism. Since Reagan, every president has to say “God Bless America” after the State of the Union address.
Another grumpy American who lives here (after years abroad) and no longer recognizes the place,
roamaround (the world)
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Paul Tergeist says:
I invite all of you anti-American whiners over to my blog. I deal with real issues, or imagined ones. Not that the patriarchy isn’t real, but I don’t have enough contrarians at my site.
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cicely says:
Remember “Under God” was added to the Pledge of Allegiance (fascist enough to begin with) under McCarthyism. Since Reagan, every president has to say “God Bless America” after the State of the Union address.
I watched the doco ‘Godless in America’ last night (In Oz) – the Madalyn O’Hair story – and it was an eye-opener to me. That atheists even require a movement, that atheism could be considered the new ‘gay’ in the U.S. (ie people admit it to each other in whispers), OMG (she writes ironically-since she’s an atheist and secular humanist), that the U.S. has more churches, synagogues, mosques etc than any other nation on the planet. I’ve always done a double-take whenever it’s somehow been brought to my attention that U.S. dollar bills have ‘in god we trust’ printed on them. Here in Oz and at home in NZ we’ve always been a bit jarred and/or somewhat amused by all the winners of film and music awards who thank god – but, as I’ve said in another thread, christianity is now making disturbing inroads into politics here too. It feels odd to think a fight may have to be put up for a seperation most of us have taken for granted over lifetimes. I’m reminded of Spike Milligan’s song: “I’m walking backwards for christmas…’
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cicely says:
That is U.S. winners of awards, obviously…
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Victoria says:
This book of yours… I absolutely must have it.
Yeah, I know, you actually have to finish writing it first, but still.
What IS it? (Interpet that question however you like: in terms of its theme, genre, title, etc.)
And will it be a Dr. Socks production or some alternate identity’s? Not my beeswax, I know, but that won’t stop me from wondering.
Any hints whatsoever would be warmly welcomed, dammit.
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diana christine says:
dear dr. violet ~ my best, best wishes to you on the book and my thanks that you manage to continue to host the gathering here. birthing a book calls for incredible concentration and time (i am working on my own book and cannot often write on my site) but you are still with us and you keep the conversation going. thank you for what you do.
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ehj2 says:
As Benjaman Franklin famously declared at the end of the Constitutional Convention, “You have a Republic, if you can keep it.”
The challenge of democracies (where power is vested in the people) is to avoid veering into mob rule. People require meaning in their lives, and in this moment in history the American people want Jesus to tell them what to do. This quaint theocratic impulse is currently employed by our corporatist masters as an instrument of mass manipulation, utilitarian in the moment as a means of repressing science and sound education because, simply, an uninformed population is easier to “guide.”
The American Constitution (God, I love those two words) still demands balance of powers and separation of church and state, and our leaders in the White House are not theocrats but oil executives with a secret energy plan that our federal courts have been unable to extricate from them. If you believe we are in the Middle East to “free” anything but the oil, you have been distracted by a well-managed (corporatist-owned) media.
The challenge of the moment is not theocracy, but fascism, where the goals of the state become indistinguishable from the goals of a military-industrial-political triad with jingoistic dreams of utopian empire. It is far safer for those engaged in such ends to have them appear guided by religious values and theocratically oriented than to be seen for what they are.
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Tom Nolan says:
homunculus. adjective: “Very gay and very brawny”.
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simply wondered says:
I invite all of you anti-American whiners over to my blog. I deal with real issues, or imagined ones. Not that the patriarchy isn’t real, but I don’t have enough contrarians at my site. Tergeist.
Whoring your blog! Really – mine not good enough for you any more? I spurn you as I would a rabid dog.
ehj2 (you gent, you) – the C of E is indeed great! It’s the only religion I could even think about stomaching – it’s religion lite, it’s new Godfree Religion with extra waff. It’s like Religionnot.
Please don’t attempt to drag me towards reality – whatever that is; it is simply too painful. I prefer sitting around taking the piss like a bitter eunuch. -
Infidel says:
The capitalists come together in a room and plot and plan and decide to impliment their devious underhanded schemes that subjegate the masses and elevate their power, they use concerted efforts buying religions here, politicians there, they control prices and supply and we demand more.
The terrorists come together in a room and plot and plan and decide to impliment their devious underhanded schemes that terrorize the masses and the capitalists, and elevate their power to spread fear and loathing, widening gaps between already seperated sects or tribes or “ideologies”.
We come together on the internet on a blog and we don’t have a plot, we don’t have a plan, we aren’t even close to devising underhanded devious schemes that do anything- but we all gain a better understanding of what terrorists and capitalists do which makes it harder for them to do it so they have to take it up a notch. -
Paul Tergeist says:
Who are you and what have you done with my pal Fidel?
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Violet says:
Thanks to all of you for your patience.
Any hints whatsoever would be warmly welcomed, dammit.
I would if I could but I cannot I know. That would spoil it.
birthing a book calls for incredible concentration and time
Anybody here read Little Women? Remember how when Jo was writing she called it being “in the vortex”? When I was a little kid I wondered what that was like. Now I know. The people in my book are more real to me than real life and I get totally caught up in their world. Sometimes it’s incredibly hard to rip myself away from them.
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ehj2 says:
Sigh of relief.
It was beginning to look for a moment there like I was actually going to have to go hang out at Paul’s.
And at my age I just don’t have the energy to keep a brace of guns in both hands and a cutlass clenched in my teeth at all times. Is it true he’s trained to kill with just his eyelashes?
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Violet says:
Is it true he’s trained to kill with just his eyelashes?
Yes. They’re coated with polonium. When he bats his eyelashes, people die.
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Infidel says:
“This quaint theocratic impulse is currently employed by our corporatist masters as an instrument of mass manipulation, utilitarian in the moment as a means of repressing science and sound education”
“…oil executives with a secret energy plan that our federal courts have been unable to extricate from them.”
“…a well-managed (corporatist-owned) media.”In the mean time other humans are gathering to decide that a pickle should be put on every burger, that impenatrable thick plastic packaging should be employed as a deterrent to theft or tampering on merchandise, pissing me off because I’d like to use the merchandise(phone charger) before I get home and get a pair of scissors, others meantime are gathering to decide that a commercial depicting macho men gathering to decide what rules apply to beer will sway my buying preferences- a blatantly patriarchal gathering that attempts humor because as we all know blatant=humor. So Archie Bunker can be blatantly bigoted- that’s funny, and Michael J. Fox or Jack Benny can be blatantly capitalistic- that’s funny. What was I saying?
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Flamethorn says:
Have another video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqqP9RvkyKc
