Studly Studies
There are now 92 headlines in Google News about the new male contraceptive, all of them variations on the following:
“Male birth control pill reversible!”
“Male contraceptive pill will not damage male fertility!”
“Men on birth control pill are still XXX hot studs!”
Okay, I made up that last one, but that’s pretty much what all the other headlines are about. God forbid that shooting blanks for a few months should in any way impair a dude’s intrinsic studliness.
It’s good to have these kind of trials, but I can’t help but recall that the female birth control pill was rushed onto the market with somewhat less concern for the impact on women’s health. The side effects in clinical trials were so common and deleterious that the female doctor in charge of the testing thought the Pill shouldn’t be released, yet the men running the show dismissed the reported effects as female hysteria. Within just a few years of being on the market, there was evidence that the Pill caused blood clots, strokes, maybe cancer, and god knows what else. But the prevailing opinion among doctors was that the risk of side effects was the price women had to pay for enjoying birth control.
None of that nonsense for men, though! By god, the male birth control pill is going to be tested and trialed to within an inch of its life. Gotta make sure it doesn’t cause cancer or make your brain explode, definitely — but that’s not enough. We gotta make sure this thing will not cramp the dudely mojo in any way. I look forward to endless headlines trumpeting endless studies confirming the stud-friendliness of the pill:
“Male birth control pill does not inhibit erections!”
“Male pill compatible with Viagra!”
“Study confirms that male pill will not reduce penis size!”
“No evidence of hair loss from male contraceptive pill!”
“Men on pill still able to barbecue, watch TV, and surf porn!”
24 Responses to “Studly Studies”
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Alon Levy says:
I suspect part of it comes from the fact that as time passes, the pharma companies need to jump through more and more hoops to get a new drug approved. There’s a well-known cliché that if aspiring were developed today, the FDA wouldn’t approve it because of its side effects.
April 29th, 2006 at 4:03 pm EST -
maupassant says:
Young men are not worried about blood clots, strokes, or even cancer. They’re worried about libido and potency first; fertility second. None of your quoted headlines refer to health effects, only to performance.
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Alon Levy says:
By the way, I should add that aspiring isn’t a drug - aspirin is.
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Paul Tergeist says:
What an idiot.
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Violet says:
The Pill in the 60s was so high-dosage that my mother couldn’t tolerate it. That’s why my Dad had a vasectomy.
By the time I went on the Pill, the dosage had been cut way back, to maybe a tenth of the original formulation, but that is still some hard shit on your body. I would get nauseated every month and have terrible headaches.
I honestly cannot imagine the male pill being released with the kind of known, common side effects that even the modern mini-dosage female pill has. I just don’t believe that most men will endure anything like that to prevent pregnancy.
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Alon Levy says:
Ignorant question: don’t diaphragms and female condoms work just as well as the pill? Or do they cause the same sort of inconvenience that makes a lot of men refuse to put on condoms?
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Paul Tergeist says:
A diaphragm has never worked for me.
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Violet says:
When I went on the pill, it was the only form of feminine birth control rated virtually 100% effective. But even if the diaphragm were equally effective I wouldn’t want to use one. Nor an IUD. Ick.
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Paul Tergeist says:
10:”But even if the diaphragm were equally effective I wouldn’t want to use one. Nor an IUD. Ick.”
Twenty years ago I invented a pneumatic insertion tool for diaphrams/IUDs that would double for tampons if the air pressure was reduced somewhat. It didn’t go mainstream because, at that time, most women didn’t own an air compressor.
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Paul Tergeist says:
Chuck Berry’s only number 1 hit. I have no idea how I know these things.
My Ding-A-Ling-A-Ling/ Chuck Berry 1972
When I was a little bitty boy
My grandma bought me a cute little toy
Two silver bells on a string
She told me it was my ding-a-ling-a-lingMy Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling, won’t you play with My Ding-A-Ling?
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling, won’t you play with My Ding-A-Ling?When I was little boy in grammar school
Always went by the very best rule
But ever’time the bell would ring
You’d catch me playing with my ding-a-lingOnce while climbing the garden wall
Slipped and fell, had a very bad fall
I fell so hard I heard birds sing
But I held on to my ding-a-lingOnce while swimmin’ ‘cross Turtle Creek
Man them snappers right at my feet
Sure was hard swimmin’ ‘cross that thing
With both hands holding my ding-a-lingNow this here song, it ain’t so bad
Prettiest little song that you ever had
And those of you who will not sing
Must be playing with your own ding-a-ling -
Violet says:
Future reference for the next person who asks me why I put up with that Tergeist guy: comment #9 above. Dude cracks me up.
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Paul Tergeist says:
Does this mean the check is NOT in the mail and I working free yet AGAIN?
When Dubya didn’t pay up I told him Saddam had WMDs and that Iran was a nuclear threat.
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Alon Levy says:
What are you going to do to Violet - tell her that Daily Kos is planning a putsch against all feminist bloggers in order to gain moderate cred?
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Paul Tergeist says:
“Putsch” is such a harsh word. It sounds like some kind of East European soup. I will offer to help her plant roses and while she isn’t looking I will get the plot of her novel. Most novelists have their plots secreted in their rose garden.
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Paul Tergeist says:
I was going to say ‘most budding novelists’ but it seemed like too much. Now I wish I had.
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Violet says:
Nah. Gilding the lily.
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BAC says:
The obvious answer to the post is that men control the research. They decide what gets studied, how it’s studied, and when it’s ready to go on the market.
For years breast cancer studies at NIH were conducted on men, because the researchers didn’t want to have to work around a woman’s monthly cycle. Gee, do you think the fact that women HAVE monthly cycles might factor into their response to certain treatments?
Of course men are going to look out for themselves.
I remember in the 80’s when awareness of HIV/AIDS increased, women were warned to be sure the guy used a condom — even if she had to put it on the guy herself. A woman sent a letter to the editor of Newsweek complaining that “first we were told we had to ‘get it up’ … then we were told we had to ‘keep it up’ … now we are being told we have to ‘dress it up?’”
When it comes to sex, women just can’t seem to get a break!
BAC
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Paul Tergeist says:
When it comes to sex, women just can’t seem to get a break!
-BACI think that’s bullshit. If you can’t find the right guy you aren’t looking in the right places. Or your cooter is dead.
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Violet says:
Ah, yes, the world is full of enlightened, liberated, pro-feminist men and it’s our fault if we can’t find them. Chalk up another one to women’s responsibility, BAC.
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Paul Tergeist says:
Piffle. I have to keep my doors locked or the women swarm in like deer flies. A single 60 year-old guy with an acre in Hawaii who likes to SCUBA dive? It’s every woman’s dream. They are over here day and night plying me with cholesterol. I had to have my prostate removed because it was ruined from overuse.
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The Countess says:
Hey, Tergeist, can’t women just use a bicycle pump? ;)
I remember when Viagra first made it to the market. It was supposed to be for erectile dysfunction alone, but most of the news was about how men’s erections lasting aeons was most important. Gotta have those hard-ons, guys. That’s what’s important. So what if you have a heart condition and can’t take it, or if it makes your vision look blue. (really - that was a side effect - blue vision).
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Mandos says:
It makes vision look blue because it has an effect on the blood vessels near the eye which has an effect on the optic nerve.
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Paul Tergeist says:
Hey, Tergeist, can’t women just use a bicycle pump? ;)
-CountessI suppose so if they removed the handle, but I’d be afraid that some of the mechanical parts would catch in their pubic region.
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hexy says:
Ironically, the only female-aimed medication I’ve seen receive such press coverage in terms of its side effects was RU486. And that was a big bag of “miniscule percetage of women have complications! not worth it! ban the evil babymurdering pill!!”
